Dileep Mouleesha -- My speeches @ Toastmasters

I am doing great, I’ll get better.

2005-03-09T23:12:00.000-08:00

You can hang me upside down, you can call me a phony and you can call me even names but you cannot dissuade me from the belief that “no one can make anyone feel inferior without their permission”.

Toast masters you may be wondering, where does this strong conviction come from? It comes from my own personal experience. When I was 13 years old, I participated in a state level Electronics competition. I won the first place, but while giving the demonstration I used a lot of fillers in my explanation. I was told that I could not talk properly. I started believing in it. Due to which I failed a number of times while giving presentations.

Wait till you listen to another incident in my life, this time nobody even had to tell me how bad I was. I simply assumed it and started doubting myself. I failed an exam in engineering. Just before reappearing for the exam I developed cold feet, declined to write the exam and also contemplated to run away from home to avoid writing an exam.

When I analyze this, I realize I took one bad experience and believed that I was not capable. Today when I stand here in front of you, I know I was judging myself very hard. Today I understand why that happened to me. Let me explain:

When I say 3 + 3 = 6, nobody will even bat an eyelid, but if I say 4 + 4 = 9 every one will pounce at me including myself. This is the brutal reality in life. Everybody has the time to points out our mistakes, but nobody has time to celebrate the right things we do. That’s what happened to me in that competition. We are not judged what we are, we are judged for what we are not.

According to the results of a survey conducted in Cambridge, we have a tendency to feel worse than what we actually are. I suffered the same with respect to the exam. I never failed a single one, but that fateful exam changed the way I tackled them.

But after making such mistakes I learnt a few foolproof tricks to help me out of these tricky situations. These are advises you would find in a self-help book, a motivational speech or a councilor. Unfortunately most of us would not of cared practicing it. Today I am going to share them all with you toast masters.

I started writing down my “strengths and weaknesses”.
I took “feedback” from your friends, family and colleagues about what they think is right and wrong.
Set long term goals
I kept “reviewing my performance” are realigning myself to my goals.

I “Zoomed out”, saw the big picture without emotionally getting involved in the situation.

I started patting my back, It cause a hell of a difference. When you do this, your image of yourself improves, your performance also improves.

Allow me to tell you how much this has helped me:

Couple of weeks ago I went to my mentor with my speech. He said this to me “Dileep you are rambling, you are getting into by lanes, you are not specific damn it ”And my mentor, a very successful management consultant for the last 30 years said with a grin on his face “You want to be a manger? You will make a pathetic manager, but you will definitely make a good professor!!”

In the bad old days I would have gone into slump and negativity. But HEY that did not happen. Let me tell you how I analyzed the comment.

He saw the negative points and judged me.
I knew my “strengths” but did not realize my weaknesses.
I “Zoomed out”. I wanted to see the bigger picture. My mentor did not want to say I will be a poor manager,

he wanted to say I am not disciplined in my speech
he wanted to say I did not know the goals of my speech
he wanted to say I did not know how to prioritize my speech.

He probably not only saw this in my speech, he must have observed it in me too. I will take this as feedback and work on it. Honest feedback is very difficult to get. When you get it embrace with both your hands.

Now when recall my experience of a 13-year-old, I laugh at myself. I’m glad I did not quit then. Had I quit then I would not have been here in front of you. Now quitting is not my personality, because I know its not that balloon that goes up, but its what inside the balloon that makes it go up.

That’s why I say “You can hang me upside down, you can call me a phony and you can call me even names but you cannot dissuade me from the belief that no one can make anyone feel inferior without their permission”.

SENSEX –7000 pts, so what?

2005-02-16T23:08:00.000-08:00

Open any newspaper “pause” you will see headlines screaming about our glorious India. India is marching ahead

· India is the fourth largest economy in the world.

· IT industry is booming.

· India’s middle class has tripled in the last 15 years.

Toast masters, we are a young nation. YES we have a bright future

Behind this success story, lies a dark side of India “pause” I am compelled to talk about

What if I tell you that India is seen as a symbol of poverty around the world
What if I tell u that India is home for the maximum number of illiterates in the world
What if I tell you that 65 out of a thousand infants die.
And what if I tell you that we are 134^th on the Human resource development index of 174 countries polled

Toast masters, we house one sixth of HUMANITY “pause” and all of them are searching for a little “dignity” and “prosperity”.

These are the conflicting scenes I as a 23 year old see.

We are country where children go to school “pause” not because they want to study, but because hungry children get a free meal.

We are a country where men work “pause” not because they want to take care of their families, but because they are bonded laborers.

We are a country where women need protection “pause”, not because they are the weaker sex, but because they are exploited.

Any country that has scant respect for Human life that spends so little on education and health care is building a very weak foundation for the future and is heading for disaster.

I feel sad “pause” that even after 50 years of independence 40% of our people cannot read and write.

I feel depressed “pause” that young children are working in factories making firecrackers and explosives?

Yes IT is booming, the sensex is touching an all time high of 7000 points.

But the poor illiterate village woman is still being beaten and dominated by her drunken husband.

What ever be our industrial growth, what ever be our technology. No nation will respect us if India is packed with poverty, filled with filth, governed by goons. If we are to be respected we need to be a country of healthy and literate people.

Nations like USA or China’s primary focus is on the Health care and Education of the people. Because they believe that this is the foundation for the growth of any nation.

Given this sad scenario. What do we do? “pause” What are our options? “pause”

Sit back and cry
Sit back and curse

No toastmasters that is not what I am saying. We cannot depend for all on the government to provide the solutions. We need cooperative movements like in Germany which were initiated by the people, unlike here in India which were initiated by the Government. The cooperative movement in Germany resulted in rapid progress and inculcated a strong national spirit. Their motto being “each for all and all for each”. In India though the cooperative movement was started as early as in 1904, it is yet to bear fruits.

But today there are shining examples even in the private sector. Aravind Eye Hospital conducts free eye checks and where help is needed is provided. Their motto being “Pay if u can, it’s free if u can’t”. The rich pay and the poor pray.

I realized that we as citizens can do so much. My personal experiences with an NGO called Friends of Children is fulfilling. Street children get basic education from other NGOs are taken forward by us. We help them get higher education and a respectable job in society.

Just imagine if we the people of India unite, we can do so much MORE. India can become a globally wealthy and respected nation.

Not for a moment am I saying India should not be technology oriented.

Not for a moment am I saying India’s IT should not BOOM

But I believe “pause”that every citizen of India should never go to bed hungry.

But I believe “pause”that every child should be able to read and write like you and me.

And I strongly believe “pause”that every woman should be treated like the way you treat your mother.

As a young lad I have taken a small step in helping street children stand on their own feet.

Maybe you can teach the alphabets of English to your maid’s child.

Maybe you can pay the medical bills of your maid’s sick mother.

Tiny drops of water make an ocean. “pause”

We are all drops of water, which make a difference to an ocean called India.

Ice Breaker

2005-02-03T10:18:00.000-08:00

Good evening, toast masters, guests and a warm welcome to my parents.

Some children are known to be born with a silver spoon in their mouth, but my story is slightly different

My parents tell me that I was born with a screw driver (smile) Perhaps they were right (in resignation)

As a kid when I was given a toy, I would open it up to see how it work. As time passed by I had opened up all gadgets and appliances in the house, It was fascinating to see how things worked. What amazed me the most what could a single electronic board in a gadget could do. But it was still a mystery how this board did this miracle. This was the reason why I took up electronics in my bachelors. By the time I finished my bachelors I did understand how it worked. But what intrigued me was how the software and the hardware worked in unison. Thus a masters in Computer Science. Presently I am doing my project as a part of course completion in the single largest Software networking company on the face of the earth, Novell.

Let me rewind a little bit, beautiful and bubbly city called Bangalore in the year 1981. I was blessed with a “bountiful” family called the “Mouleeshas”

What more could I have asked for? Father who was the HOD of Neurosurgery and mother a principal of a preuniversity college.

I had an ideal childhood playing with my sister, 3 years older than I. and my other constant companion was my dog. I remember that I missed my dad immensely as he was pre occupied building his own career.

Much of this loss was made up in the future years when we would go out and play Tennis every single morning. He was punctual and immensely dedicated in what he did. You could check your watch with my dad’s first serve. Thank you dad for those important lessons!

I went to Air Force School. I was good in academics (must be the defective genes my parents passed on to me), I was one of the toppers also fared well in sports. But trust me when I say I was terrible in Singing and Dancing. It is the superlative form of bad. I believe its only self perceived limitations and I bray in public. I am learning how to dance. I am the only machine in a bunch of dancers, meaning I am so stiff, but I will not give up.

My alma mater for me was not just academics and sports, it was a value builder, a value instiller and a value pointer. I can still feel the vibration of “saare jahan se achaa” which we sang even today which we sang. Maybe this is the foundation that lead me to join Janaagraha, much to my regret I have not made a great contribution. But trust me I will put my best foot forward for this.

The curious among you who would like to know what I do in my spare time, reading books is my greatest passion with me. And the rest of the time I love to meet and talk with people. And that’s the reason my mom would vouch that I should not get myself a cell phone, because when I had one, calls would never stop coming in.

Future beacons me to do an MBA from one of the top universities in the world. I am willing to risk it all for it. I am willing to go the distance and risk it all time, money and unlimited effort.

I May not have the same experience as the senior toast masters here but I have learnt that no pain no gain.

I have the best friends in the whole world, but I have not nurtured friendship very well. I know I must make amends and cultivate friendship. I am also organizing a class reunion shortly, that’s my first step towards it. Mom are u listening? No matter how many more friends I make u will still be my best friend!

I believe in destiny, but that does not mean I am fatalistic. I believe u can carve out your own destiny with the 3 D’s Dedication, Determination and Discipline.

My inner voice tells me “Dileep will be engaged with an NGO”. There lies my future.

My guiding philosophy cold not have been captured better than our president APJ Abdul Kalams Poem “Me and My Nation”

As a young citizen of India armed with technology, knowledge and love for my country I believe small aim is a crime

I will work and sweat for a great vision

The vision of transforming India into a developed nation

I am one of the citizens of a billion

And only the vision will ignite a billion souls

It has entered into me that that the ignited soul

compared to any resource is the most powerful resource

I will keep the lamp of knowledge burning.